Internet dating the rules
More importantly, sites like and Large and Lovely Connections create “judgment-free zones where the like-minded can mingle freely and furtively.” Convinced you’re a vampire? Williams, CEO of White Label Dating.com—a platform that helps companies to build new dating websites—says the key to online dating begins with recognizing that everyone else you’re interacting with is in the same boat. Textbook example: Andrew, a 31-year-old architect bruised from an eight-year relationship that went sour, gained confidence after more than 1,000 women looked at his profile.
Mojo restored, he added a witty ultimatum to his Ok Cupid profile: “Contact me if you can ride a horse.” Sure enough, Jennifer, a 30-year-old horse trainer, sent him a message.
“For them, pictures come first, because they’re so visual, and for good adaptive reason,” says Helen Fisher, a biological anthropologist and Match.com’s chief scientific adviser.
“For millions of years, a man needed to size up a woman to see if she could give him healthy babies.
), we perused the latest manuals and lovingly present this roadmap to the world of e-romance.1.She switched teams, allowing herself to study her female competitors through the eyes of a man.Webb studied 96 women in all, an experiment that allowed her to unearth “a trove of insights.” Some statistics were less insightful than others—for example, Webb found that half the women she observed used the word “fun” in their opening sentence.Webb developed a detailed rating system, awarding points for each criterion that a prospective date fulfilled.Then, she crafted 10 distinct online male personae to understand the dos and don’ts of the digital dating game—in this case, that of JDate, which caters to Jewish singles.And if you’re one of the 90 million singles in America, you can do it online.Just in time, there's a whole bunch of new research on the topic, from Amy Webb’s Data, a Love Story, in which the author games the system to find her match, to Dan Slater’s Love in the Time of Algorithms, a naked account of the pluses and pitfalls of online dating.Webb, author of book Data, a Love Story, is a self-declared expert.After a series of “comically bad” dates, she felt defeated, as though online dating “only made it easier to meet a whole bunch of wrong men, the kind who lied in their profiles or who had major character faults.” But instead of giving up, she got mathematical.Women could see if a man was a good hunter, but she had to do more than look to see whether he would hunt for her.” 4.If You Get Stuck, Game the System To play the field, you’ve got to understand what you’re up against.