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Her rule, she tells me, was that she doesn’t “fuck them, kiss them or even touch them.” Seeking Arrangement calls the sugar baby lifestyle “dating with a purpose”, and for Rachel at least, that’s what it was.
“I did it when I lived in Cali because it’s literally just dating rich people and getting 0 after it, which was the only way I could afford rent.
I don’t see the why people think they have to justify it.
If people judge the lifestyle they obviously just don’t understand it, and who can be bothered with judgemental people anyway?
People who have bad experiences are usually people who are bad at sussing people out and checking the details carefully.
“I really think that the people who make it out to be this awful thing need a reality check cos they’ve either A) done it wrong or B were too prude for it in the first place.
“It wasn’t that they weren’t good looking”, she tells me. Or sometimes I didn’t like how they made their money, so it didn’t sit right with me morally to do anything more than one date.
Sometimes I feel a little bit sorry for them, but they’re getting company from me – even if they are paying.But if you’re being paid you know the deal and don’t draw attention to it.” Since moving back from California, though, Rachel has put her sugar baby life on hold. The guys are poorer here, and you’ve got to do it in London otherwise it’s just completely pointless.” Since getting into a relationship she’s deleted her Seeking Arrangement profile, and doesn’t speak publicly about her experience.Despite the attempts to reclaim a sugar baby lifestyle as a feminist choice, the stigma is huge.Sometimes you’ve just got to sit there and smile nicely until it’s over, but I have no wish to be some married guy’s outlet.” Although Rachael lived in California for six months she comes from a small, working-class neighborhood in England, and explained that Seeking Arrangement gave her a chance to experience things she never would have had access to otherwise. “People always ask me how I could do it if I didn’t really enjoy it, so I’ll always ask them if they enjoyed stacking shelves or working in Mc Donald’s. It’s just a job, but mine is paid a lot better.” “And I get to have really intelligent conversations too, like way better than I’d get off a Tinder date.I once went out to dinner with an ambassador and we talked about his job all night, discussing politics and current events.And as it’s become more mainstream, sex work, escorting and sugar-daddy-ing have become part of the feminist school of thought of owning what you do with your body and your time.But is it a bit far to equate thousands being paid to date a man with eliminating the wage gap?I spent like 0 and the rest I put in my savings.” The most common “allowance” is ,000 a month, but that’s usually arranged after the first date. The match starts normally enough, similar to how you’d chat to someone on Tinder or Bumble.The daddy will ask you out, they offer you money for a date, and you decide whether or not to accept based on how big that offer is.” Rachel spent six months as a sugar baby while living in San Francisco, where the average rent price on a two bedroom apartment is over ,000 a month.During her time doing it she earned over ,000, but never took any of her liaisons past a first date.